It’s an understatement to say that the past 12 months have been difficult. The uncertainties of the future in addition to the day to day stress of our fast paced culture can leave us feeling constantly on edge as we try to keep up with all that’s going on around us. It’s easy to get stuck in a rut of seeing all the negatives around us. We can lose motivation to keep moving forward and just feel overwhelmed and stuck.
Most of us have grown up in a culture that says we need to constantly push ourselves in order to reach our goal or we’ll get lazy and quit; that if we slow down to celebrate our wins we’ll lose motivation to move forward in life. Science has shown over and over again that self compassion and kindness is much more effective than being harsh with ourselves. One way to practice self compassion and break out of the stress cycle is by celebrating our wins; not just the big ones, but especially the small ones.
The limbic brain (the “fight-or-flight” part of the brain) is resistant to celebration because it’s so preoccupied with trying to process perceived dangers that celebration seems like a waste of time and energy. It takes intention and focus to think about our wins, but when we do, here’s how it can revive our motivation and joy.
1. We release the neurotransmitter dopamine, which gives us a feeling of reward. This gives a boost of motivation to keep going. So if you’re feeling a lack of motivation, taking just a little baby step of progress and celebrating the win will help you get back on track again.
2. It helps the limbic system to relax, leading to the release of stress and worry. The limbic system can’t be stressed and relaxed at the same time, so when we focus on our wins it lets go of the stress.
3. The more consistently we celebrate, the easier it becomes. The brain loves to create habits that it can repeat over and over again. The more we celebrate, the easier it becomes to guide the brain out of stress and into relaxation, joy, and connection with those around us.
This has definitely been a process for me. I grew up on a farm in the midwest with a strong work ethic. The focus was on getting the job done and moving on to the next of the neverending list of chores; we just didn’t take the time to slow down and celebrate. But I’m seeing the benefit of taking time during the day and especially in the evening to celebrate and find joy in tackling the difficult parts of my day, even if it’s just a baby step.
Do you take time to celebrate the small wins? What are your favorite ways to celebrate?