So on Monday as I went jogging, I had an unfortunate run-in with a car. Not a full-on collision, but a close call. As I dodged the car, my foot landed in what out of the corner of my eye appeared to be a puddle. Turns out it was a pretty good sized pothole. I don’t even remember hitting the asphalt, but I do remember limping home. A few hours later my husband had to come home from work to drive me to the doctor. Turns out that fortunately nothing was broken, but I would need to be off my foot for up to two weeks, depending on how the pain was doing, and it could take up to six months to fully heal. Ugh. Not what I was prepared for.
So now it’s Friday. It’s been a tough week, but not at all as I had expected. Here’s what I’ve learned.
- I’ve come a really long way with my health. Not that long ago I had significant health problems. I was unable to leave the house unless it was critical, and even then, I often had to wear a mask. I had little energy to do much of anything, much less the “routine” chores of life. Now that I’ve spent a few days being limited (can’t drive, can’t walk) I realize how far my health has come. Amazing!! Yes, this is an inconvenience, but just temporary. So much of my progress I’ve taken for granted. I have so much to be grateful for!
- It’s really hard to ask for help. I’m seeing how independent I am. My family has been so willing to help, but it’s just hard for me to ask. I think it’s that feeling of vulnerability that just feels difficult to face. I find myself apologizing for not having done the dishes or fixed dinner, when they’re just as happy to do it themselves, if only I’d ask. I’m seeing that it’s not so much that they don’t want to help, but they often don’t see the needs unless I ask
- People close to me are wanting to help. So often I think I’m a burden when I ask for help. After all, I’m the mom – I’m supposed to be the one who does the cooking, cleaning, chauffeuring, etc. But my family has really wanted to support me getting the rest that I need. My husband has arranged to work from home this week (as much as I tell him that he doesn’t need to), and my son keeps insisting that he get things for me so that I don’t have to go up and down the stairs.
Difficult circumstances provide lots of opportunities for growth. They can give us time to reflect and be grateful for so much that we typically take for granted. They can also be a chance to strengthen relationships and draw closer to the people in our lives – if we let them. We all go through difficult circumstances, some more difficult than others. But we do have choices. We can armor up and bulldoze through them alone, or we can relax, be grateful, and enjoy the ride. One option will leave us lonely and bitter, and the other will leave us loved and cared for. We have the opportunity to choose, minute by minute, day by day.
Life can change in an instant. Make consistent efforts to connect with others either by helping or by asking for help. Use opportunities to find gratitude and to build relationships without judgement or the expectation for reciprocal behavior.
So, what are your lessons learned from going through difficult circumstances?
